Meteorologists; How do these people actually keep their job? I mean in what other job are you expected to have absolutely no idea what is going on? Do we expect when a mechanic who works on a car that the engine might get "stalled" for a couple of hours and not work? How then is it that when a meteorologist says it's going to snow and if it doesn't he gets better equipment? The way I see it is they get paid to guess on national television about what's going to happen in the weather. They put up fancy charts that move across your television screen and point at stuff as if you have any idea what they're showing you. For all you know they could be showing the chart of someone's stomach.

“And here's where the clouds are coming in forming a high-density low-pressure zone. This is a very dangerous area. We could see a lot of tornado activity.”

For all you know this could be an inflamed appendix.
“We're going to have to operate. This could get messy. I think the appendix is going to burst.”

Seriously how hard to the job be? Each morning put on the broadcast for weather that Fargo had last night. At nighttime just put Fargo's morning weather on. Then shove some bimbo in front of it and tell them to flail their arms about and point at the pretty clouds. And if ever the forecast seems to be wrong tell them the weather got stalled. This seems to cure all ails when it comes to failure on this job.

“I'm sorry Mr. Johnson, the surgical procedure we were performing on your wife got stalled. We tried our best but couldn't save her.”

“If only I schedule that operation for 24 hours later. My wife would still be alive”

That's what I want for a job. One where failure is expected and when I succeed they rewarded me with electronics. Could you imagine if you were lawyer... Never mind I don't think any of you can imagine that. You still have souls. All right let's say you're a zookeeper and your animals keep dying. Now each animal cost hundreds of millions of dollars and when they die no one gets mad at you. But if by some odd chance one of them lives and the people who visit the zoo actually have something to look at... You would be crowned king of the world and women would throw themselves you. Okay so maybe I'm exaggerating a little bit about people going to the zoo, but you can imagine how ridiculous that seems. Or if you, each night, turned on your TV to ESPN to watch a bunch of highlights for basketball in the middle of June. You would know the basketball highlights would be phony. So why would you watch? The same is true with the weather. You watch every night and when is the last time you remember it being accurate? I checked up on it and the last weatherman to actually predict the weather correctly was promptly shot by the station's director. This just no room for that sort of thing.

This article is in memory of Francis McDougal. A fine weather man and a good guess.

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