Me: I am bored. How about you?
Chair: …
Me: I hear you. So what is it like being a chair?
Chair: …
Me: That boring, huh? Have you ever dreamed of being something different?
Chair: …
Me: Never?
Chair: …
Me: Wow, I total dream about being something or someone different all the time. Right now I am think about what it would have been like to be Doctor Mudd, the infamous doctor who fixed John Wilkes Booth’s broken leg after he assassinated Lincoln. He probably felt pretty bad.
Chair: …
Me: I am with you. I don’t think we will ever know.
Chair: …
Me: Do you like it when people sit on you?
Chair: …
Me: Both yes and no, I will wager. Yes because it gives you a purpose for existing and no because of the whole sweaty butt thing.
Chair: …
Me: Not into butts, huh? I guess everybody has to go their own way on that one. How long have you been here?
Chair: …
Me: So long you cannot even remember. I feel that way some days and I haven’t been here all that long.
Chair: …
Me: Do you remember when I first started working here? What did you think of me?
Chair: …
Me: Not one to jump to conclusions? I hear that. Too many people jump to conclusions and then end up looking stupid. What do you think of me now?
Chair: …
Me: Yeah, I think that we get along alright. Not much really to say.
Chair: …
Me: Hey, somebody’s coming. Talk to you later bro.
Chair: …
Chair: I am not your bro.