There is a new national epidemic that isn’t being listed in the pages of our medical Journals. It hasn’t made front-page coverage or first story news scare tactic like the glamorous bird flu. Instead this epidemic is sweeping the nation one head at a time. Well, more like one forehead, but you get the picture.
Giant Foreheadim is not a birth defect. Seemingly normal foreheaded parents are giving birth to these walking billboards. Even normal children can grow up to have gigantic foreheads.
Research done at Berkley has laid to rest the farfetched tales that increased brain size due to over zealous learning has lead to this monstrosity of the epidermis foreheadious. Instead it appears that the over use of facial blemish removers and other facial creams are to blame.
Due to the nature of this epidemic it has effected some of Hollywood's elite actors and actresses. The average Hollywood forehead has grown by over 1 inch in the past 4 years alone.
Some have even tried to fight back by removing their foreheads and chins completely as a means to avoid not only ridicule but comparisons to John Kerry as well.
It was just the other night on the way to my parents house that an individual riding a motorcycle behind me gave me quite a scare when it appeared that his facial features had almost slide the entire way off of his head. He could have easily cleaned his own chin off with his tongue.
Aveda institute is now working on a cream to reverse the side effects of other creams. Yet for this particular epidemic there is no immediate help.
Giant Foreheadim is not a birth defect. Seemingly normal foreheaded parents are giving birth to these walking billboards. Even normal children can grow up to have gigantic foreheads.
Research done at Berkley has laid to rest the farfetched tales that increased brain size due to over zealous learning has lead to this monstrosity of the epidermis foreheadious. Instead it appears that the over use of facial blemish removers and other facial creams are to blame.
Due to the nature of this epidemic it has effected some of Hollywood's elite actors and actresses. The average Hollywood forehead has grown by over 1 inch in the past 4 years alone.
Some have even tried to fight back by removing their foreheads and chins completely as a means to avoid not only ridicule but comparisons to John Kerry as well.
It was just the other night on the way to my parents house that an individual riding a motorcycle behind me gave me quite a scare when it appeared that his facial features had almost slide the entire way off of his head. He could have easily cleaned his own chin off with his tongue.
Aveda institute is now working on a cream to reverse the side effects of other creams. Yet for this particular epidemic there is no immediate help.
Friendlies
RecommendTED
Looky Here
Previous posts
Archives
- November 2005
- December 2005
- January 2006
- February 2006
- March 2006
- April 2006
- May 2006
- June 2006
- July 2006
- August 2006
- September 2006
- October 2006
- November 2006
- December 2006
- January 2007
- February 2007
- March 2007
- April 2007
- May 2007
- June 2007
- July 2007
- August 2007
- September 2007
- October 2007
- November 2007
- December 2007
- January 2008
- February 2008
- March 2008
- April 2008
- May 2008
- June 2008
- July 2008
- August 2008
- September 2008
- October 2008
- November 2008
- December 2008
- January 2009
- February 2009
- March 2009
- April 2009
- May 2009
- June 2009
- July 2009
- August 2009
- September 2009
- October 2009
- December 2009
- January 2010
- February 2010
- April 2010
- May 2010
- June 2010
- July 2010
- September 2010
- February 2011
- March 2011
- June 2011
- July 2011
- January 2012
- February 2012
- April 2012
0 Responses to “The New American Epidemic”
Leave a Reply