Notes from the news


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All employers in the United States face a difficult problem. How to lower the company’s Workers Comp premiums? Well one company has finally solved the problem. A Warwick tree service company found one glaring loophole. Just before the scheduled hearing for a workers comp case to address the slashing of the workers face with a chainsaw (self inflicted), the individual was deported. That is a sure fire way to keep down costs.

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Schoolteachers across the nation have joined together to bash the No Child Left Behind Act. Now this is what we have been waiting for people. Hundreds of years of repressed anger unleashed by the people who have heard the best burns, insults, bashes, and all around crude jokes in the history of the world: middle school and high school teachers! Of course the Elementary School teachers will probably have their fair share of insults but they all have to rhyme ala Liar, Liar Congresses self assessment of the No Child Left Behind Act’s pants are on fire!

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The I-Phone is scheduled to be released on June 29th according to Apple. This release date coming after months of other release dates being announced and then denounced as the product release has been postponed for undisclosed reasons. Yeah, I might not recommend going out and buying a first generation I-Phone unless you get a replacement warranty that includes “Total replacement if the product just doesn’t work”. Delays to follow.


2 Responses to “Notes from the news”

  1. Anonymous Anonymous 

    You misunderstand the iPhone issue, Ted. Those were release dates for the upcoming release dates to announce that a release date for the iPhone was coming soon (Actual Release Date Still to Be Announced).

  2. Blogger Ted 

    Thank you, Oh Thom. You have again seen the truth through the haze.

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