I would like to start off today’s post by saying hi to Ben.
Hi Ben! How are you? Really, you like bears as well? That’s unfortunate, because today’s post is more of a muskrat post than anything else.
Okay and now back the madness.
I have good reason to believe that the Unicorn population at large is plotting to over-throw our government in order to silence me. I really don’t understand why they just don’t kick me repeatedly with their hooves, but the plans that have been leaked to me clearly involve a cunning John Kerry impersonation.
I have an inside informant at the Embassy for Unicorn and Galactic Enterprises who called me last week quite scared that the end of the work was coming. I calmed him down and checked him into a rehab clinic so he could deal with his fairy dust addictions. Still, I couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something behind his crazy banter.
I called another friend who does one heck of an Elvis impersonation and he told me that he would go in and check it out (Unicorns love The King). After 13 days of hip waggling and crooning the Unicorn King, Tramadron, let him in on the secret plan to take over the United States and forever silence TWH!
I have taken some precautionary measures. Firstly, I am writing this blog from one of the seventeen presidential nuclear fallout shelters. Only three of the bunkers are currently known about and all are heavily guarded. Good luck finding me you crazy ponies! (Unicorns hate it when you call them ponies.)
Secondly I have implanted a small tracking device in the neck of John Kerry so that when the Unicorns do their switch I will be immediately aware of it and will be able to alert the media to the sudden change in the demeanor of Mr. Kerry. Such notable changes will be the glow about personage of Mr. Kerry, the arrival of pixies to his residence and his ability to fly.
With this plan we will be able to thwart the evil plans of…
Unicorns are naturally gentle characters and are inclined to peaceful co-existence. I, Ted WasHere, was clearly making a joke and do not want to foster anti-Unicorn sentiment. Thank you for the time that you have spent enjoying this amusing anecdote.
Trama… I mean, Ted, Out!
Hi Ben! How are you? Really, you like bears as well? That’s unfortunate, because today’s post is more of a muskrat post than anything else.
Okay and now back the madness.
I have good reason to believe that the Unicorn population at large is plotting to over-throw our government in order to silence me. I really don’t understand why they just don’t kick me repeatedly with their hooves, but the plans that have been leaked to me clearly involve a cunning John Kerry impersonation.
I have an inside informant at the Embassy for Unicorn and Galactic Enterprises who called me last week quite scared that the end of the work was coming. I calmed him down and checked him into a rehab clinic so he could deal with his fairy dust addictions. Still, I couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something behind his crazy banter.
I called another friend who does one heck of an Elvis impersonation and he told me that he would go in and check it out (Unicorns love The King). After 13 days of hip waggling and crooning the Unicorn King, Tramadron, let him in on the secret plan to take over the United States and forever silence TWH!
I have taken some precautionary measures. Firstly, I am writing this blog from one of the seventeen presidential nuclear fallout shelters. Only three of the bunkers are currently known about and all are heavily guarded. Good luck finding me you crazy ponies! (Unicorns hate it when you call them ponies.)
Secondly I have implanted a small tracking device in the neck of John Kerry so that when the Unicorns do their switch I will be immediately aware of it and will be able to alert the media to the sudden change in the demeanor of Mr. Kerry. Such notable changes will be the glow about personage of Mr. Kerry, the arrival of pixies to his residence and his ability to fly.
With this plan we will be able to thwart the evil plans of…
Unicorns are naturally gentle characters and are inclined to peaceful co-existence. I, Ted WasHere, was clearly making a joke and do not want to foster anti-Unicorn sentiment. Thank you for the time that you have spent enjoying this amusing anecdote.
Trama… I mean, Ted, Out!
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I tried posting a comment yesterday and it wouldn't let me. My comment was this:
WOOOOOOOO!!!
I am well, how are you?
Maybe it's better that it didn't show up.
Did unicorns hijack the comments?